Travel-lover

Instead of people, I fall in love with countries and cities. Japan, Istanbul, Cyprus, now it’s also Budapest – and who knows how many more wait for me in future. While new ones add to the list, my love to previous ones never fades. The unique charm of each place is alive in my heart.

It’s both different and similar with normal human romance.  The same anticipation before meeting – I am thrilled when I board a plane! It’s also a sensual pleasure, when a country surrounds me with its air, when I walk along its streets, taking in its sights, its smells, I can even taste a country…

And then there are memories, little things. I like to buy in my travels somehing I can wear – clothes, shoes, accessories. A skirt from Yokohama. Summer shoes from Hiratsuka (they don’t already exist, such a pity). A warm, soft baggy tunic that I found on Cyprus. A copper ring  from Istanbul, from those numerous stalls with handmade accessories. Rings and earrings are my favourite. As if I am engaged to each country with a ring…

And then it’s parting and separation. It can be also painful, it can hurt even to see photographs of the places where I’ve been. Especially with Japan, because I can’t return there so easily. How long I haven’t been there?…  Random things remind me about it, like some special color of the sky, or a smell on a car parking. I see dreams about Japan and other countries, even unknown countries, and I feel happy in these dreams. Is it bad? Is it addiction? I don’t think so. I prefer to call it love.

MacDonald’s

There is a MacDonald’s in our living area, within walking distance. It was built quite recently, about 2 years ago, and since that time me and my daughter go there regularly. She scolds herself for that and feels guilty because she thinks it’s not healthy for her. I don’t scold myself though I gained weight. But we can’t stop.

The thing is, we don’t go there for any specific food or coffee or something. We go for atmosphere. We want to sit in a cafe and talk, and watch the street flowing by. It’s a piece of different life in our provincial Russian city. It remind us of many cafe in other countries we have visited. But there are no cafe in Russia that are both good and cheap – well, very few of them (except Moscow and S.-Petersburg). No place to eat and talk. Restaurants are too expensive. Small cafes are mostly concentrated in big shopping malls, maybe for economical reasons. And when you just walk along the street, there’s nothing. While if you walk along the street in, say, Istanbul or any town in Japan, big or small, there are tons of various cafes and restaurants to choose.

Of course there are economical reasons for that as well. Small business is in a desparate situation here. Taxes and rent and corruption makes it very difficult to run. Global corporations like MacDonald’s, KFC and Subway can survive even in Russia, but not local businesses. Which is really sad…

That’s why out evening often – oh, very often – goes like this. After my working day ends we go out on sunset and head for MacDonald’s. The later the better, so that it’s not so crowded with high-schoolers and parents with small kids. We take some food or coffee and something sweet, sit next to the window and talk. A vague illusion of different life…

Traveling: not yet

I saw a dream about Barcelona tonight. I’ve never been there, so it was a bizarre place of my imagination, but I kind of knew it was Barcelona anyway. I was so happy there. Traveling, traveling! When and where will be my next one? I don’t know. I want it so much…

My daughter wants it desperately, too (she hasn’t traveled anywhere even longer than me). But our circumstances are still complicated. My brother’s trial took place on Feb 17, and he was sentenced to 1 year of imprisonment. Half of this time has already passed while he was waiting for the decision. But there is still half a year left… For me it means that I keep staying with the two kids and can’t move around the world freely.

Why can’t I move? Oh well. My nephew is 16, but it’s absolutely out of the question to leave him alone at home. It’s dangerous for himself, my apartment and the cats. While my daughter was able to stay alone for a month at his age, he is a disaster even when we are around. No, no!

At worst I can go with both of them, choosing the cheapest (and preferably visa-less) destination. But will it be really enjoyable? Then, in such case I must get a permission from his mother… Such a bother! I’m too tired to think of all these organizational things. So maybe we’ll just wait. And while waiting, I’ll work and save money and dream…

Waiting

I’m waiting for my brother’s court judgement. They say the hearing will be soon… but the day is still unknown. At least the investigation was over last month (after almost half-year waiting – it was August when he was arrested). They let him sign the papers, he admitted his guilt. We are all waiting. To know the decision finally, to be able to plan our life for future.

So when my child asks me “Let’s go traveling somewhere”, I say “Let’s wait until we know the decision”. Can I spend money for traveling? Shall I go with only one kid or with both of them? My nephew will feel lonely if we leave him alone. And then, where shall he stay while we are away? Not in our apartment definitely – it’s just dangerous, with his negligence and absent-mindedness. But to take two of them? I am already so tired…

In this state of waiting I became kind of passive, not doing anything actively, unable to make decisions. Only the most necessary things. Work is the top priority. It helps me to distract from worries, organize my time, it challenges my mind and lets me feel important. When I have free time, I go to the gym or swimming pool. It’s time for myself, twice a week or more if I’m lucky. As for housekeeping… I neglect it more and more. I’m just not in the mood to do anything when these kids do nothing.

How long more do I have to wait? And what will happen then? My brother is guilty, but I really hope he will be released on probation. I want my life back. My home, my time, my money, my freedom to move. Please please let the decision come soon, and let it be good!

Facing the winter

I’ve returned from Cyprus 2 weeks ago. It was great! I was happy there in spite of sad thoughts about my relationships. Blue sky every day… Mild sunshine and fresh wind… The sea! oh, the sea! It took about 30 minutes by walking from the hotel to the city itself, and all the way laid along the sea. I was taking in its color, its sound… sometimes waves broke against the parapet, and I could feel drops of salt water on my shoulders.

Tourist season was almost over, so there were few people in the streets. I like overall atmosphere of Cyprus which is very different from, say, Turkey, even though they are neighbouring countries and have much in common in foods etc. Cyprus is more gentle. I felt very calm and relaxed there. I was even seriously considering how I could live there… for 9 months a year, because summer is hot like hell. To rent an apartment and return to Russia every 3 months… But I know it wouldn’t solve my problems. Living like that won’t make me a citizen. Only a temporarily escape – no. I want true escape.

It is always the same: after each of my trips I feel more and more reluctant to go back. The last day, the last hours in the airport is a sad good-bye to one more country where I feel at home. Why do I feel at home everywhere except my own country? Russia’s problem is not just lack of comfort – it’s lack of dignity. And… I feel very insecure. Even there, on the resort, following Russian news, now and then I began to worry. Exchange rate… Rouble is falling against US Dollar and Euro, lower and lower every day. Correspondingly, prices are rising. I am personally lucky to this extent because the company pays me in US Dollars. But what should other people do? And all the same, I can’t be sure about what comes in future.

By the way, my long-distance boyfriend returned to me (if it’s possible to say so about someone far away). After I wrote a good-bye mail to him, he called me by Skype, and we made up somehow. But… it didn’t make me happy. On the contrary, next day my heart was heavy and dull, like “Oh no, all this again!” Maybe when I thought it’s all over, my sorrow was about the past, sweet memories that will never return. I am not angry at him. I like him as a person and would be happy to keep nice relationships as friends. But I guess it’s not love anymore. We know everything about each other. We are like a tired couple who have lived together for years… only we did it separately. He talks about marriage next year, in autumn, but I can’t imagine that. Can’t imagine us married… I don’t know how it may end. Why I continue this relationship? Don’t want to hurt him? Don’t want to lose him? Unfortunately, he doesn’t understand friendship – nothing else but love. Oh no. I only hope for some unexpected turn of events.

And what is the most desirable turn of events? A job. Getting a job abroad, be it Japan or Europe. I have some hope for the translation company I am working for. I don’t feel good about immigration via marriage, at least for me personally. I want a job more than a man…

Well, now it’s Russian winter again. I hate it. I curse each time when I have to walk outdoors in dark hours. With ice under the feet and only half of street lights working, I step cautiously and slowly, like an old woman. New Year decorations appear in shops, but it doesn’t make me happy. How can they think of celebrating New Year here! It will sure bring nothing good.

Bitter-sweet vacation

Hello! I am on Cyprus now. I got so tired of work, kids and all kind of worries and decided to give myself a rest. One week on Cyprus, alone. The children are big enough and can cope without me. Of course I’m worried about them, but nevermind… Anyway, we can connect by Skype anytime, to make sure everything is all right.

Cyprus is great, just the right place to rest and relax. The summer heat is gone, but it’s still warm. The sky is cloudless. The sea… Oh, the sea! My hotel is facing the beach, and I can hear the sound of waves every moment. It can make anyone feel happy, and I do feel happy.

But at the same time I feel sad. Right before the trip I quarreled with by Japanese boyfriend, and we parted. It was inevitable, I was ready for that for some time. But it’s still painful. Even though these relationships were mostly virtual (long-distance), it’s still a big piece of my life. A piece of my heart. I know I’ll recover and become fine. I’m a champion of unhappy love, so to say. But now it’s the hardest time. I am lonely, and at the same time don’t want to see anyone. At daytime it’s fine, with new impressions and exploring the new places. But when evening comes… Do all people become more sentimental at night? Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I listen to sad music. Or go down to the dark beach and sit there listening to the waves. The moon rises above the sea, its shape strange and crooked. What will come next? Life is going on…

Istanbul

Last year I added Istanbul to my happy places. I spent there one whole month, taking a TEFL course (to become an English teacher). Actually these courses are everywhere. I chose the place for reasons of convenience: it was the closest and less expensive, and then Russian citizens don’t need a visa to enter Turkey.

For several first days I was a bit frustrated by the fact of my being there. How could it be, I am abroad but it’s not Japan? But with the time I got to love Istanbul. Now I miss it too. I walk along labyrinth-like streets of Istanbul in my dreams. Who knows what other countries I will discover in future and make my happy places as well… I hope there will be more!

Japan: Story of my love. Part 4 – Beach, cakes and other things

One of the days I had no appointments with my friends and decided to go to a beach. I was staying in Hiratsuka city, Kanagawa Prefecture, and knew that there was a good beach in Chigasaki which is the next station by railway. So I took a train to Chigasaki. 

I really have a passion to explore various places by my own, but there was just a little problem. I knew how to ask a question like “Sorry, where is something?” in Japanese, but absolutely couldn’t understand the answer. When I approached a young girl in the street to ask where was the sea, I had a hope she would just point the direction. But she started explaining it in many words among which I could only understand “station”. So I returned to the station and started my search once more. After I asked a group of guys about the beach, they quite reasonably didn’t even try to explain the way but advised me to take a taxi instead. There really was a taxi stand nearby. While thinking what to do next, I discovered there a map of surroundings, very good and detailed. So lucky! The sea could be seen Southwards. Now I knew the right direction and began walking.

The part of Chigasaki lying between the station and the sea was all small streets and houses with tiny gardens. I could see people watering their gardens on that hot summer day. The walk took about half an hour. Houses ended and I saw a highway. By direction signs and some surfers making their way to the sea by cars and bicycles, it was clear: the beach is somewhere there!

Oh yes, it was there. A wast sandy beach and the great Pacific ocean. By the time I already had a short glance of it in Kamakura when we went down to the seaside together with Chie, already in twilight. I was impressed by strong waves and their roaring sound. Here it was the same: tall roaring waves. That beach was absolutely different from those I had known in Russia, for example at the Black sea. Sea is not an ocean, you know. Waves rarely become tall, and a lot of people are swimming. Even more people are lying under the sun, covering the whole place all over like seals. We have quite a little part of sea coast for such a big country, so every summer it is really packed with vacationists.

Japanese beach was totally different. Not crowded at all, which really surprised me. People were coming with families and putting tents to protect themselves from the sun. Children played in shallow water, and fathers were teaching them to surf. Are Japanese all surfers? Anyway, it must be a really hard job to swim in such waves. But I wanted to feel them, I wanted to enter this wonderful ocean.

Here one more problem came up. There were no changing cabins or any other facilities in sight, nothing at all! The beach seemed absolutely wild. (Later I discovered another beach equipped with all necessary things just next to that place). Where could I change into the swimwear? Why am I so stupid? I should have done it beforehand! Oh no… Looking around desperately, I found a sort of a low fence enclosing some empty space. It was deserted, far from the water and could shield me from strangers’ eyes quite well. So I went and climbed over that bamboo fence and quickly changed there. Still don’t know its purpose, but that time it really saved me!

Now I could enter the water! I put my clothes and handbag on the sand, not far from someone’s tent. In Russia such carelessness about personal belongings is simply impossible. When a family or a group of people goes to swim, one of them always stays to watch the things. But here I could leave it without fear. The ocean at last! Yes, I couldn’t swim there but I could play with the waves letting them roll over me and sway me and knock me down. Fantastic feeling! The water was very warm and very salty. The sand had unusual dark colour, looking almost black when wet. I enjoyed the ocean as long as I could and left the beach reluctantly, trying to hold in memory the powerful sound of waves. 

What else I wanted to tell about? There were so many fascinating things I discovered during that trip. Cakes in a cake shop at my station – I wanted to taste them all! Sometimes I bought one when returned from sightseeing in the evening and took it to my hotel room. Other kinds of shops – oh yes, I love shopping in Japan! I bought some clothes and shoes, and presents for my daughter and others. I even had to buy an extra bag to pack all the presents. Among them there were pretty soft toys from a theme shop with goods from Hayao Miyazaki animation. Everybody will be so glad! 

The trip was going to an end. I didn’t want to leave but was eager to share my impressions with family and friends and give them presents. Bye, Japan!  I did return there again several times, but that first encounter was really unforgettable. I still keep some souvenirs from that time. Don’t know when will be the next, but I will sure see you again. It’s a promise!

 

Japan: Story of My Love – Part 3. My Friends

It’s summer now, and this hot summer weather revives my memories even brighter. So, I was there! One afternoon to explore the town, and on the next day I was to meet my first Japanese friend in real life. It was a woman of about the same age as myself, named Rie. She was also kind of my colleague, a translator, so her English was perfect.

Of course I worried before this meeting. First of all, how I will greet her? Russian girls hug and kiss easily, showing their friendship, but what about Japanese? I knew nothing about proper manners. Furthermore, I didn’t know how to eat with chopsticks! Oh well, I had a chance to train this skill a little during the breakfast in the hotel. I was just watching the other people and tried to copy their ways – yes, difficult, but I managed it somehow. Then I got on a train and went to the station where we had arranged to meet.

Rie was waiting for me there on the platform. Her attitude was very simple and friendly. She came up to me and hugged slightly with one arm, and I was relieved. From the first moment we were communicating absolutely freely, talking about everything without slightest embarrassment. We spent two consecutive days exploring Tokyo. She showed me around usual touristic destinations like Imperial Palace Garden, a big shrine (shame, but at that time I couldn’t remember the names of places) and Tokyo Tower, as well as the places which were special only for her. She was wearing comfortable clothes and was a restless walker, which I liked too.

 

In the evening of our first day she said: “Now we are going to a restaurant. My boss is coming too. He heard that you are from Russia and became interested.” Oh no! I was not ready to meet a boss! I felt panic again. Official manners and so on…  no, no! But this came out not scary as well. The boss of the small translation company was on very friendly terms with his employee, they were exchanging jokes all the way. Of course he also spoke good English. He paid for the dinner – I suppose it was an expensive one (including delicious eel!) He greeted me by shaking hands and really asked a lot of questions about Russia. Little by little I became more confident from hearty encouragement by two of them. I showed photographs of Russia which I specially brought there. I tried to pronounce the few Japanese words I knew by the moment – and was praised and encouraged again. Then they both showed me how to make paper cranes (“Origami”). It was really a nice evening, without any strain.

The next person I met was a guy named Keiichi. He also arranged to meet on Tokyo Station, and there I was lost. Those who know Tokyo Station can imagine that. It’s a huge place with so many entrances, passages and so on.  I was running back and forth in confusion, together with crowds of people. Keiichi called and sent me messages on the mobile, but it little helped. At last I found the place where to wait. As he told me in the message, “I am wearing white shirt, black trousers, glasses and carrying a black case.” But it was the time when working day ended. Crowds of office workers poured out of the station, all wearing white shirts, black trousers and carrying black cases! Luckily, I stood out too distinctly as a foreigner, so he was the first to notice me. I had seen a picture of Keiichi before, but it was not very good, he was much better in reality. A charming guy, but too busy. We had only short time to meet. He took me for a drive around evening Tokyo and to Haneda Airport, to look at the airplanes. We talked about our families and countries and parted as very good friends.

Whom else did I meet? My best and dearest friend Chie, who worked as a tourist guide in Kamakura. She knew the place perfectly and introduced it to me. In course of the sight-seeing we entered little shops and cafes now and then, for rest and shopping. We also went to eat Okonomiyaki, in a fry-it-yourself restaurant where frying pan is built into a table. It was fun – and delicious too! In the evening we went to Karaoke, which turned out shame for me again. Actually I got prepared for it, having learned some songs. But… I had the lyrics in Romaji, and was caught by surprise when saw the text on the screen in real Japanese – Hiragana and Kanji! (I wonder what else should I have expected?) Of course I immediately forgot everything I had learned. But Chie helped me kindly, and it was all right in the end. After singing I danced for her. I am not very good, but wanted to show it anyway. It was a great memory for us. 

And the last was my Indian friend, a guy named Prasad. He lived in Yokohama that time, working as an engineer in some high-tech area. (Now he returned to India.) In the very beginning, when we just became pen-friends, he stated out the condition: “NO ROMANCE! I am looking for friends only.” I readily agreed with this, because I actually wanted the same. He was really a good friend, and then, he could share the experience of a foreigner in Japan. Right from my arrival he was giving me a lot of advice by e-mail: “It’s so hot. Do drink much water!”, “Please take a fan when you go out!” and the like. We met on the last day on my stay there, and he introduced me Yokohama. It’s still one of my beloved places in Japan – Sakuragicho, Minatomirai, Yamashita Park… We walked and talked a lot. He laughed at my English pronunciation, but felt respect for my efforts in studying Japanese (Prasad himself could speak Japanese a little, but couldn’t read or write). We sat relaxedly on the stone steps near the calm water of Yokohama Bay. We ate Indian Curry. We exchanged presents (I don’t remember what I gave him). And then the day ended, and that was the end of my trip. 

My dear friends, I am so grateful to you all. I still keep correspondence with some of you, but some people have already disappeared from my view. I know it happens, being quite a normal thing with pen-friends when relationships come to the end for some reason. I remember you all, and these memories are only good and tender. Sometimes I wonder: where you are? How is your life going on? Please, please, be all in good health, safe and happy!   

Japan: Story of my love Part 2 – First Impressions

It was quite a long way. First I had to get from my city to Moscow which took 24 hours by train. By airplane it would be only 2 hours – oh yes, Russian trains are slow! – but I took a train to save money. In Moscow I received my passport with Japanese visa in the travel agency, and then there was still long time before my flight. I was very nervous and worried like a fool about numerous fictional obstacles that could arise unexpectedly. What if I don’t pass control in the airport or my visa is wrong somehow? In addition, my face looked awful because of allergic rash. What if they don’t let me on board, mistaking it for some dangerous infection? Maybe I’d better wear a mask? I am really stupid and over-panicky when it comes to such things. Luckily, now I usually travel together with my daughter who takes things much calmer and tries to comfort me as well.

At last it was over, and I was in the airplane. A huge Airbus, first time in my life! The flight from Moscow to Tokyo takes almost 10 hours, actually the whole night. I was scared only a little in the beginning, but then… just looking for ways to spend time and trying to sleep. Flying to the East, we saw sunrise very early and headed further towards the sun. And then after crossing the sea it was there below: all neatly divided into squares, with tiny ships along the coastline.

Japan! I am in Japan! Nobody came to meet me in the airport, but I remembered the instructions of my friend: “First you should take Narita Express to Tokyo and there change to Tokaido Line, orange colour, to get to your hotel.” Very good and clear explanation. Only there was no railway. Really! I went out of Narita building, looked around but there was nothing except highway. Where is the train? I returned inside and asked a man wearing uniform: “Where is the train?” That time I knew only very few words and phrases in Japanese – enough to ask a question but not enough to understand the asnwer. Luckily, in Narita everybody can speak English, so he readily taught me what to do: “Go down there please”. The railway station was underground! I still had to get used to it. In Japan many things are underground, like shopping centers, stations, parkings and so on.

The first challenge was over, and I felt more confident. I got to my station without any difficulties, easily found the way to the hotel by map, and at the front desk they handed me my rented mobile phone which had been already delivered. I took a shower, changed clothes and went out to explore the town.

It was really hot. Of course everybody warned me about it beforehand, but now I felt it in full measure. Japanese summer heat is just different from that of our climate zone. The sun is burning fiercely, and you need to drink very often. Luckily, drinks are available everywhere from those helpful vending machines. Most unusual for me were very early sunset (7 p.m. in August) and the fact that it didn’t get cooler even at night. Here in Russia twilight can last almost until midnight in summer, and evenings are usually cool. Well, now I like both ways! I had a great pleasure walking along evening streets, feeling hot air and looking around curiously. So many little restaurants and shops with food – food was everywhere! Parking lots for bicycles! Everything was new and strange, but I never felt lost, scared or lonely, even alone in the crowd. It was rather safe, relaxed and excited. Feeling of Japan…  so special for me. From the very first day and every time afterwards, I feel happy when I am there. Just happy. Every moment.

To be continued…